H no.2 – ‘Hekate’
It seems kind of obvious that a blog with Hekate in the tagline would have to write about Her during the ‘H’ week here on the Pagan Blog Project, but as usual I try to keep things interesting, and so this isn’t your typical “Hekate is so cool!” post.
Here’s how I think this might be different; I’m not entirely sure I should keep Hekate in the tagline.
You see, when I started this blog it was with the intention of exploring Dionysus and Hekate. I’ve explained before that Hekate was the aspects of witchcraft that I was familiar with (though hardly an expert on), such as herbalism, rituals, and the real witchcraft kind of stuff. Dionysus was the new, the scary, the exciting. The more religious aspect of my practice. He was the things I didn’t know at all and wanted to explore.
This is still the case, but I feel I may be dishonouring myself before Hekate for a very simple reason; I’m very nearly ignoring Her.
In the past year, Dionysus has been at the forefront of much of my practice. He is enigmatic, but charming. He is ecstatic, but woeful. He is so many things!
But, Hekate is just as many things; Her cult is varied and Her history is vast. And therein lies my troubles. Because, you see, I might have bitten off more than I could chew. Hekate is known by Her devotees as “the goddess from afar”, a cool and meticulous goddess who makes you work hard to discover Her secrets and teachings. Hers is a devotion all its own, which takes time and persistence. Neither of which I think I have enough of at the moment.
As this realization came to me, I sat down and really thought about how I am interacting with both of the deities I chose to explore. Dionysus chose me; of that I am sure. He, as I said before, is enigmatic and ecstatic. He is the spiritual and the religious. I see Him as something a bit foreign. He intrigues me, and I feel I must follow Him. Something like a lover.
Hekate is something less explosive, but equally important. She seems to me, to be more like a favourite witchy aunt, or a brilliant professor. She is someone I highly respect and admire. Someone who’s skills and knowledge I trust, and feel I can turn to in times of need. She is there to teach me when I need it, though expects me to really commit to the lesson every time.
And there it is.
She expects me to commit every single time.
And I haven’t.
What right have I to ask for Her support in my daily devotions if I don’t work with her regularly?
She is a teacher who deserves a focused and committed student and so I may need to defer my intended devotional practices to Her until I feel I really can give Her the attention She demands (and rightly deserves.)
When I started this blog I had found The Covenant of Hekate, an online community that serves as a cult of Hekate, including initiation ritual. I had considered doing it, but this exact situation is why I hadn’t, and now I am thankful that I had the forethought and respect to not rush into anything without thorough consideration.
I think that She understands my intentions with this decision (I hope She does, anyways), and that it will keep us on good terms. She will still have a spot on my altar, or perhaps Her own altar. She will stay in my thoughts and I will still try to work with Her at times, but I feel it is wrong for me to claim to be a devotee without putting in the actual work; like saying I go to Harvard, but then never paying tuition or showing up to class.
How should I go about this? I feel I should make an offering to her soon, thanking Her for the time She has been waiting on me and for understanding my decision.
I’d like to know; Have any of you ever deferred your devotional practice with a deity? Have you ever left one entirely behind? Why, and how?